DEAR ABBY: My daughter “Scarlet” has a precious 18-month-old baby girl I’ll call Sierra. Scarlet, her husband and the baby spend a lot of time at their beach house, where they have several full-time employees, including a nanny, housekeeper, cook and gardener. These employees have been at the house for years and are practically part of our family. The problem is, my daughter and her husband allow Sierra to walk around the house and beach-front naked throughout the day.
I have told Scarlet on several occasions that I don’t feel comfortable with Sierra being exposed like that around the employees. A naked toddler might make them feel awkward, plus a child should be raised to understand that her private parts are just that – private – and not for anybody outside of her immediate family to look at.
Additionally, from a sanitary perspective, Sierra sits down on dirty, potentially bacteria-infested places such as kitchen tiles, grass and beach sand, which could cause infections. My daughter calls me old-fashioned and tells me not to worry. What do you think? – More Modest in Nevada
DEAR MORE MODEST: I seriously doubt that anyone is going to be embarrassed by the sight of a naked toddler. I know you mean well and your points may be valid but, frankly, I think you should let your daughter raise her daughter.
DEAR ABBY: I’m 61 and a recent widower. I befriended a new co-worker, a woman who is single and 41. We started going out socially, and I was getting back into life.
I just found out she and my 24-year-old son have been dating for the last four months. Neither one mentioned anything about it to me. They were sneaking behind my back, and she continued to do things with me. When I realized what was going on, I confronted her and told her I felt taken advantage of and deceived. I stopped speaking with her after that.
Am I wrong to feel this way? Her relationship has come between my son and me. And yes, I realize it takes two to tango. – It Takes Two in the East
DEAR IT TAKES TWO: Your son and your co-worker should have been upfront with you. That neither one was shows a lack of character. However, there is an upside to this. You now realize you are ready to go on living after the death of your wife. Get involved in community activities; go on some dating sites and you will meet someone better suited than your co-worker. What happened with her is yet another unfortunate example of what can go wrong in an office romance.
DEAR ABBY: I have a quick question. How long after a death should you wait to send a sympathy card? I have looked at your mom’s and aunt’s old columns, Amy Vanderbilt and Emily Post and cannot find an answer. – Needs to Know in Georgia
DEAR NEEDS: The time to send a sympathy card is when you receive the sad news.