Here’s my pet peeve: oversized parked trucks that stick out into the street. Why aren’t these hazardous monstrosities ticketed? You have to drive in the oncoming lane or scrape the entire right side of your car. Also, you can’t see over or around them and the only option is to pull out slowly and hope no one is coming. It’s particularly annoying along side streets and East Second Avenue. – Driving a Hybrid
There are truck people and car people. They rarely see eye-to-eye on matters of transportation.
So let’s not go down that road. It’s a dead-end.
If you pick a fight with pickups, and you’ll soon have truculent truckers.
Then you’ll get an extended lecture about extended cabs and an overview of oversize trucks symbolizing the Western Way of Life.
Likewise, if you’re hypercritical of hybrids, you’ll soon be enveloped in a choking cloud of smug.
The pious Prius driver will be fuming, and you’ll get an exhaustive exhortation of how zero-emission is the Durango Lifestyle.
It’s ironic how “The Western Way of Life” and “The Durango Lifestyle” are miles apart yet occupy the same space.
And speaking of space, let’s pull into the issue of on-street parking.
The city’s standards for parking spaces are clearly defined in the Land Use Development Code.
Parallel parking spots must be 8 feet wide and 22 feet long. Angled parking needs to be 8.5 feet by 18.5 feet.
There’s an exemption for “compact” spaces truncated to 15 feet.
As such, Durango parking spaces can accommodate most “regular” trucks. After all, the standard Ford F-150 pickup is a smidge over 17 feet long.
But what self-respecting truck buyer would settle for mere basic?
We’re talking the Truckosaurus Rex edition, with a Super Duty, Magnum Force, Extreme Quad, Ultra-Crew Extend-O-Cab.
It features a mega-muscular V-18 Hemi-Demi-Semi nuclear reactor powertrain, along with a heated steering wheel, leather seats and Starbucks cupholder.
And just to be fair, the haughty hybrid buyer won’t settle for basic, either.
The Sustainable Green-Drive system comes with a feng shui Eco-Rainforest interior, holistic solar windows and an OnStar satellite-connected yoga studio locator.
It features a center console composting bin, Dark Sky compliant headlights, along with a heated steering wheel, leather seats and Starbucks cupholder.
Now that everyone is marginalized, note that there’s no margin of error in parking. Either you’re in the space or not.
Vehicles extending over or straddling marked lanes will get a $25 ticket.
“It’s called a ‘Not Wholly In Space’ violation,” said a Durango parking enforcement officer.
“That’s ‘wholly’ with a W and not an H,” Action Line confirmed.
“I suppose it could be for ‘holy,’ as in ‘Holy Cow! What an awful parking job!” the officer said with a laugh.
“Yes, we do ticket anything that sticks out into traffic. Cars or trucks, the vehicle doesn’t matter.”
Size, however, matters. If you have a crew cab Ford F-350, you’re a parking ticket waiting to happen. This particular model is 22-plus feet long, which exceeds any parking space in town.
What’s a law-abiding crew-cab caballero to do?
“Large trucks can park across two parallel parking spots and pay both meters,” the helpful parking enforcement officer said. “You can do that with trailers and RVs, too.”
Thus, multimodal-obsessed Durango has room for oversize truck diversity, wherein inclusiveness happens as long as you stay between the lines.
Email questions to email@example.com or mail them to Action Line, The Durango Herald, 1275 Main Ave., Durango, CO 80301. You can request anonymity if your other bike is a truck.