Cheat, lie and steal. That was the winning formula for Cosmopolitan restaurant, champion of Steamworks Brewing Co. annual waiter/waitress race, said team member Chris Hughes.
Hughes was appropriately dressed as Pinocchio during the race, with red knickers and long nose made out of masking tape.
The Cosmopolitan team clocked in at 1 minute 3 seconds on the fairy tale-themed obstacle course that included oatmeal, croquet and, of course, Steamworks' beer.
Ten teams of four tested their serving skills at the event, which started out with a ladder climb up to the Steamworks deck. From there a racer from each team had to gulp down a 10-ounce glass of stout beer and sweep up trash on the floor.
Once they got the go-ahead, the next team member had to eat up to three bowls of oatmeal in search of a small, plastic toy hidden in one of them.
“There's no health code at all with the oatmeal,” warned Sean Moriarty as two contestants stared into the bowls of hot cereal. Moriarty emceed the race dressed up as a hairy-legged Goldilocks.
Next up in the race, one team member had to carry a tray full of water glasses while swerving around children's high chairs and avoid being pelted with peanuts or chased down by a helper dressed as the Big Bad Wolf. When the water-carrier had dumped and put away the glasses, a fourth team member downed a glass of Steam Engine Lager not-so-cleverly disguised as tea and knocked a croquet ball through a cinder-block goal.
The puddles and snow patches on the Steamworks parking lot added to the challenge as the staff climbed and shuffled its way through the course.
But it was chowing through the oatmeal in search of the toy that showed to be the biggest hurdle for most teams. Moriarty had one piece of advice. “Use your telepathy skills,” he said.